The ex and how not to handle frustration

When I got to the ex's (only a little late from my stopping) she was in tears. She had lost her sat nav car charger and had had to go get the boy from his new drama class and didn't know where it was. When I got there, she had all the cupboards out and she burst into tears. The boy was upstairs playing on his PC and talking to one of my friends whom I trust for him to hassle. I am glad actually, it gave him a way to get out of her way while she was in such a worked up mood. I gave her a cuddle as she cried and told her it was ok, and she let out her frustration too. She said she had ordered a new cable on ebay and hoped it was the right one, so I offered to check. One of the cables she actually ordered was wrong and that made her upset again. So, I emailed them and asked them to switch it for the right one so I hope thats all sorted.

This is a difference between us. She handles frustration by getting upset and bursting into tears and stopping. I kind of go quiet and try and just survive and get on no matter how much it hurts. I knew she needed a break and these things are easier to handle outside the house, so I took her and the boy to the local starbucks at the supermarket (as I needed some milk and things anyway) and bought her a latte, the boy a milk and me a chai tea. It helped her relax anyway away from the situation and she was happier when she left. It hadnt been a good day for her in all. She had received a letter saying her appeal for a breast reduction from the health services had been turned down. That on top of her parents going on holiday to Australia soon, losing the cable... worry. It had got too much for her.

Monday she has a hospital appointment about her liver problems and she is scared. She doesnt want to tell her parents in case they postponed their trip, or nagged her. I am staying over there tonight anyway as I have to go to the dentist tomorrow for a checkup (and I think i have a hole, grrrr) and its still over near hers.... so what could i do? I of course offered to work from her house tomorrow so I could go with her to the hospital and sit with the boy, so she wasn't alone. It means driving home in the dark tomorrow night but, somethings you really just have to do.