This is so weird. I keep turning round thinking something is missing, something is wrong and not knowing what it is. Then I remember that she's gone and that that's what is missing.
I guess the realities of her being gone are settling in. It's felt like a bad dream, and I keep randomly crying. I guess the upside of that is just how much she means to me. I miss my friend. I wish she hadn't had to leave completely, could have just not had pets. I do however understand how it had to be all or nothing. If you have to make it work, you have to give it your all and not take half measures, I've been there. She must be hurting pretty badly and she hasn't got all the support of our mutual friends, so my heart keeps going out to her.
In other news today I went back to the Doctors for my checkup and they are pleased I got past the side-effects without giving up, as they were pretty extreme. Have to go back in 3 weeks again to see if they have had a positive effect. I told her about my brother and sisters anxiety problems and she was hopeful there might be a chemical basis for it in our family, so the anti-depressants would have a good chance of helping. She asked if i wanted to pursue the other avenues, counselling or group therapy. I said for now I just want to concentrate on seeing where I am when this settles properly.
My corset is beautiful though I havent tried it on yet. They sent the wrong eyelet leather panties - panties and not a thong, but they were so good about it. They've told me to keep the ones they made as they are bespoke for my size, so they will make a new thong too. Such great people.
Thats about it except I can't sleep, even with a Nytol. I just feel groggy instead. Going back to bed. My parents came back from Arizona yesterday, so going to them with the boy over easter break.
I guess the realities of her being gone are settling in. It's felt like a bad dream, and I keep randomly crying. I guess the upside of that is just how much she means to me. I miss my friend. I wish she hadn't had to leave completely, could have just not had pets. I do however understand how it had to be all or nothing. If you have to make it work, you have to give it your all and not take half measures, I've been there. She must be hurting pretty badly and she hasn't got all the support of our mutual friends, so my heart keeps going out to her.
In other news today I went back to the Doctors for my checkup and they are pleased I got past the side-effects without giving up, as they were pretty extreme. Have to go back in 3 weeks again to see if they have had a positive effect. I told her about my brother and sisters anxiety problems and she was hopeful there might be a chemical basis for it in our family, so the anti-depressants would have a good chance of helping. She asked if i wanted to pursue the other avenues, counselling or group therapy. I said for now I just want to concentrate on seeing where I am when this settles properly.
My corset is beautiful though I havent tried it on yet. They sent the wrong eyelet leather panties - panties and not a thong, but they were so good about it. They've told me to keep the ones they made as they are bespoke for my size, so they will make a new thong too. Such great people.
Thats about it except I can't sleep, even with a Nytol. I just feel groggy instead. Going back to bed. My parents came back from Arizona yesterday, so going to them with the boy over easter break.
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