I weighed myself on a whim this morning after my shower. It must have been a year or so since I last weighed myself and it was quite a shock. Well I admit the first time I read it I checked the scales again as I didn't believe it. Last time I looked I was about 115lbs and now I'm 134lbs.
OK so I know I will get jumped on by a million women for bitching about my weight at that.... but it's not so much the actual weight that freaked me, it's the gain... the idea of it being out of my control. I know there are a dozen factors contributing to it, age, a more sedentry lifestyle over Winter, the citalopram, maybe being more settled and eating more. After so long of being picked on for being skinny, the thought of putting on weight is strangely hard. Especially of it looking out of proportion with my frame... you know the dreaded middle-aged tummy. I think most of all though it's that out of control feeling. I'd already started using my ex's exercise bike and now I think I am going to stop being lazy and start walking to the train station again! Sometimes we need a kick up our asses to stop getting complacent! At least now I won't get toppled over by the wind.... just time to make sure it stays in all the right places!
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