Thunder (day two)

Thunder day two. Yes, I know its been months, but I am slow. This will be briefer as I am getting tired, heh, and have 30mins remaining on the battery here... It was also awhile ago, and I don't want to bore everyone. I'd never been to one of these things before and didn't know what to expect. One of my friends was going through a rough time and that made things a little complicated in the group (and I am SO proud of you for getting yourself together again petal, you are a good girl and a good friend and next time we get together things will be so much better). I was lucky enough to wear my dragon collar with Ms Jolie's tag on for the weekend. Two of the lectures stick out to me. The first two I went to. The first was service with a smile, for all us service subs out there that get up in the morning and have a "well f*ck you" moment when we are grumpy and don't really want to do whats been asked of us. It was packed. It was funny. It was witty. It was true. It was heart felt. It was practical. It didn't hide from those tired upset ill moments. It didn't pretend just get on with it. I looked around all all these wonderful kinky people and felt a kindredness to them. Boys, Girls, TV, TG. Straight, gay, bi. Subs, pets, slaves. All nodding away together at the things she said. It was wonderful hearing so many subconscious thoughts vocalised by her, and so many little coping techniques. I was bouncing around afterwards as it felt so ME. She also said some wonderful things that stick with me. The most important was that as someone providing service you are not weak, you are not giving up responsibility as you cannot cope with life. You are not just waiting for orders to be lazy and avoid it... In fact you are taking on extra responsibility. For yourself and your Master/Mistress. You have to look after yourself and after them. Keep yourself well and safe and ready to serve so you are in a place where you can anticipate and meet their needs. I loved that. The second class I went to was "unarmed BDSM". This was basically a quick A to Z of things you could do without any toys or props. It was brilliant. Very fast, very funny, the presenter had such energy. He was also very British and it was a giggle to hear his accent in the middle of Denver. He also loved having all these things being done to him and barked excitedly at any opportunity. I also learnt a lot about the legal situation here in the UK as he was a member of the spanner trust and people were asking him. Its amazing what you can learn when you don't expect. Oh and it was also sheer total heaven as MsSilvie scritched my neck the entire time. What can I say, I am a tart. I don't deny it. I went to a talk abou Master/Slave relationships and it was definitely a different type of thing than applies to me... but it was very interesting to listen and watch people. See the kinds of questions they asked, what it revealed about their lifestyles and backgrounds. It was kind of an honour to be exposed to so many different types of community. D/s, S&M, Leather, Lesbian, Het, all in one place and see how their dynamics were different. The variety in one place, was comforting. Even a little pup can fit somewhere. I will gloss over the rest of the seminars as I (in my humble little opinion) was not enthralled by some of the indications of cult of personality or hero worship in certain areas... I don't need a lifestyle coach, I am quite capable of screwing up my own life well enough without one of those ;-). I am glad I went to the ones I did do, and I am glad (at that time) I went to the more basic or "why we do what we do" ones. I don't think I would be so inclined to go to them again though. I know I have a lot to learn about my quirks, desires, motives, how to serve, how to be better me... but for me now I think I am learning more by seeing how others live their lives and get through their battles. Learning by living life, not hearing someone else telling me. That may change in the future when I get over this growing spurt and need to consolidate my thoughts again, who knows? :). Now I feel more in a practical phase of trying to put into reality the things I have learnt, try things, get knocked down, get up and try again. Live and enjoy life a bit. Learn practical skills and test abilities and desires. The evening dungeon it was just going to be Ms Jolie and I walking around as Ms Silvie was fairly tired and worn out after a long day, no air and a lovely meal. I dressed in the lovely outfit Ms Jolie had helped me choose. My heeled ankle bootlets. My fishnets. My red and black tartan skirt. My black fitted top. My black collar with red dragons. I felt so proud to be led out like that. No leash as she didn't want to break my neck if I fell... so I could stay like this wherever I went in the hotel, without having to hide. Just be like this as we walked around the public and private areas. We went to the car park dungeon and walked around, watching people... then back to the main dungeon... the same... before finally the car park dungeon again. Such different energy between the two. I loved the industrial simplicity of the car park. I also loved the grip on my high heels :P. The car park... things really happened. More intense whippings... more passion... more energy. Screams... Quieter music so it didn't drown everything out. Vacuum sacs... Trample walks... Fire play... a beautiful beautiful piercing scene through the upper arms and then patterned with ribbons. I watched that for quite a while, surprised I wasn't squicked by it. I thought I would be. The girl having it down was simply beautiful. She was naturally beautiful, but the pleasure in her eyes... it was entrancing. The way she breathed as the needles went in. The soothing way he spoke to her. It was an amazing thing to watch and I felt quite humbled to be able to see it. It was quite moving and quite soothing. Ms Jolie looked after me and made sure I sat down a lot and checked I wasn't hurting my legs as it was the first time I had walked in heels for any length of time (heh like ever) and the first time I had been seen in a skirt by anyone. She kept dropping me comments about people looking at me but I never saw it, I was just really proud to be led around by her with her tag on my collar.

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